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emmy [AT] curious-notions {dot} net
September 2020
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For the monarch

I didnt post yesterday because I keep thinking, omg, how much whining can I do in a week? Apparently the answer is a lot. I’ve been hanging on twitter and spamming blogs because y’all, today was fucking fantasticly sucky. After Monday and yesterday (which, it was just yesterday, but I spent the ENTIRE day working on something that was FANTASTICALLY SIMPLE BUT I AM AN IDIOT). So that was fun. Today, the homework is due. The homework that I created and am going to grade. I have no finished the solution for the second homework I am supposed to create. So I went in (despite feeling ragged) because I knew there were going to be a ton of questions. There were. I think we got a new question at least once every 15 minutes. Mostly the professor answered them. I also had a kid scoot in to ask me a question right before 4 (which is the end of the time period I told students they could stop by).

All of this would have been fine. I would have worked on my solution and hopefully gotten most of it done and it would have been fine. Wasn’t to be. Because the second of the two homeworks is going to be assigned tonight since all the kiddies are turning in the first one tonight. But I get an email from the prof saying that my third question doesn’t work. There’s only three questions. I kind of stressed myself out of my mind this weekend and Monday putting together these questions and figuring out what these kids were supposed to do. She raises a… possibly not valid question, but I’ve got to answer it. I got to tell her why and I honestly am not sure. I have no CLUE. I twittered “I AM NOT SMART ENOUGH FOR THIS SHIT PEOPLE.” Because I DON’T KNOW. (I’m about to blubber all the tech shit. Ignore the rest of this paragraph.) I don’t know whether the CPI number for the CISC instruction version of this code is valid or even if the tools that we’ve made available will pick up on the difference between the CISC and the RISC implementations. The tools suck, that’s one part. The other part is that even if the ISA differentiates between CISC and RISC, the actual hardware implementation takes those pretty CISC instructions and breaks them down anyways. But I don’t have anything that will give me actual numbers for anything. For execution time, for CPI. Nothing. So whatever. I came up with a way to ask the students! And then I realized that was horrific and I tried to take it back but the professor liked it! *sighs* I’ve been feeling teary since then. And sad. I feel so stupid. Stupid stupid.

I’m tired. I’m cranky. I’m hormonal. I feel so dumb. I feel hideous. I want this week to be over. I want to stop being so self centered. I want to stop being so whiny.

But my friends are going to have a baby!!! I am so excited. Her middle name is going to be Korean for butterfly. They aren’t sure how to spell it yet (Nabee, Nabi, or Nabie). She isn’t even born, but I won’t put her full name on a public blog. If you want to give your vote, email me and I’ll give you the full name.

  • http://linda.curious-notions.net linda

    when is this baby due?

  • http://knittingforbears.curious-notions.net emmy

    Mid December! I’m excited. I think we are gonna try and visit a few months after the baby is born.