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emmy [AT] curious-notions {dot} net
September 2020
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Sound of Settling

Bear and I just started a job for my aunt. One of the few members of my family that Bear genuinely likes. Some days I wonder what’s wrong with us. 1) Because I have the ability to piss Bear off so fast. Or frustrate him. Or annoy him. I do not think the way he actually expects me to think. I do not work the way he expects me to work. He thinks I’m brilliant (my husband confounds me.) and this means he thinks that I think the way he does. I think he’s brilliant, but there’s no way in H-E-L-L that we think alike. We don’t process information the same, we don’t think the same, we don’t have similar memory abilities. 2) Working for my aunt?? Well, she’s going to be polite because it’s Bear. That’s the only saving grace. It’s going to be a pretty massive project. With the promise of a good payoff. But we both work full time.

Other than that, it’s been an awesome weekend. I lie. Even with that, it’s been an awesome weekend. Bear and I spent some time outside on Friday. I took the wheel outside while he walked around and we talked. Then we had dinner and a generally nice evening. Saturday, kept spinning. Watched movies. Hung with Bear. Avoided computer like it would give me the plague. And not the Black one. It was a pretty great day. Today I’ve worked on my aunt’s mockups (wireframes with use cases as per Bear) and spun some more and watched some BAD movies. Picked up AJ from the airport and took her home. Got into a fight with Bear on the phone about nagging and whether I’m a natural nagger or if we could fix things so that I didn’t nag. We dropped it. *sighs*

Lin, if you see this, I saw 7 lbs (the movie?). Did you tell me to see it? I gotta say dude, I was kinda pissed. I did not expect that at all and I hadn’t wanted to see another sad movie. I was so pissed. Ugh. Strangely though, not at the actual plot. I found it pretty… not believable, but I saw why it happened the way it did and am ok with it. It was more that I didn’t start it expecting it to be the movie it was and I’ve been grouchy since.

Sometimes I miss all subtext

The other day, I was helping a coworker, we’ll call him Menace. For some reason, despite being a computer engineer, the guy has no basic Unix skills and lacks basic curiousity to figure things out on his own. Two very base things I would expect from anyone with the title or position of computer engineer. Which meant that when he can’t do something, I get to either do it for him or tell him how to do it considering the current development platform for our latest hardware is Linux. Half of me wants him to not learn, because it’ll keep him from fucking up the box. (I do that well enough on my own thanks and that’s with years of experience on him.) Half of me wants him to figure stuff out on his own so he’ll stop asking me questions. None of me wants to have to teach him things that 1) I learned on my own just because I knew I needed the skillset and 2) I learned years ago.

Right, there is a story in here, not just whining. I was going through some very basic stuff with him when my advisor and her friend LK stopped in. Now LK has worked with my advisor in our lab a few times. They’ve been friends for many years. They are also as different as night and day. My advisor is dry and calm and keeps her distance for the most part from her students. LK is a whirlwind of activity and sees no reason that you shouldn’t be her best friend. Or at least share the good gossip. A month or two after I got married LK whirls into the lab and looks at me and goes “How could you get married and not tell me?!”

Again, story. I’m teaching Menace and my advisor and LK walk into the lab. Menace and I stop and we all start chatting. This would be nothing new. She asked how I was enjoying married life, we chatted our a missing labmate, they talked about getting their grades done, etc. At one point we got around to being in academia. LK and my advisor ask the Menace if he is planning on becoming a professor. Menace says, “I don’t know.” Then they turn to me and ask the same thing, “Um. No. Not really.” I get the exact same surprised look on both their faces, but I pretty much didn’t take too much notice of it.

That evening I’m telling Bear this story and he groans. “Why didn’t you just say you didn’t know??”

“Because I’m pretty sure the answer IS no. But they did seem surprised.”

Bear was no impressed with my politicking. “Most likely they didn’t expect you to tell them that.”

So apparently I’m pretty dense. It could also be because I’ve never been shy about the fact that I enjoyed some parts of being a TA. Mostly just the student parts. Not the grading or being a grunt to 3 profs. Also maybe because when they walked in, I was helping Menace, and not with research or anything. *sighs*


I need to create in 3 days what has taken a coworker of mine 3 months. Woo. hoo. Of course I’m blogging instead of working, because really, who doesn’t want a little extra stress?

I really was supposed to work on laundry and packing and get started on this project this weekend, but I ended up doing fun things instead. I don’t regret it at all.

Saturday I got a call from my new friend, AJ. She was having lunch with her mom right around the corner from me. So I trooped off and ended up hanging out with them for hours. We had lunch, went to the Sprint kiosk and bought boots. You would not automatically assume that hanging out at a Sprint kiosky thing for almost two hours would be fun, but AJ and her mom are that awesome. I’d never even met Mommy AJ before.

I think when I go home (weird how I haven’t lived at “home” for more than six years, but it still is home in my head) though, I might need to figure out to have happy quality time with my mom. I think I might have come close to attempting to mommy poach. It’s just been a damn long time since I was anything other than the Mean and Unsympathetic Daughter. I will be so glad when school is over for her.

Bear and I ended up going to see Quantum of Solace at midnight on Saturday, which completely hosed my Sunday. AJ and her mom had seen it the evening before and I realized Bear and I hadn’t seen it yet. We could have gone at a more humane for Emmy time, but no. Bear’s clock is still flipped. Honestly though, my laziness hosed Sunday, but waking up at 2 in the afternoon really didn’t help anything. At least I go home in a few days and that will reset my clock. I miss being a morning person. Helps when you know little kids are up and wanting to play with you. Or having a mother that wakes up at 5am.


Life got awful crazy there for a little while. Before the holidays I had a big meeting and a draft of my class project due. This meant I needed timing numbers for the lastest checkpoint in my research, I need status for the rest of the research, I needed the project to be at a certain point and I needed a paper explaining the project. At the same time Bear was having crazy things happen at work. Power outages because of sewer explosions, servers going down. It meant I was sleeping about 5 hrs a night and running full steam when I wasn’t sleeping.

Everything was supposed to calm down on the Wed before Thanksgiving. It was supposed to be an easy, light, calm day. Then I restarted my work computer. It didn’t come back up.

I cannot tell you the panic that washed through me. Pure adrenaline and panic.

I spent the next 5 hours trying to reinstall the bootloader. (I still have no clue WHAT I did to screw that up. I did do a kernel update on accident but the last time I did that on accident, it just screwed up the grub configuration file. How the kernel update actually hosed the grub install, I can’t figure out.) Thanks to having the most nonstandard setup in the world, nothing worked. My birthday was Thursday and Bear and I wanted to go home so badly, so finally I gave up and we went home. Bear had also been stressing about some boxes not being at home. Seriously stressing that they were supposed to be here. They were, the neighbors had taken them so that no one would steal them. We have good neighbors, because if someone had taken these? I would have cried. Turns out they were full of one of the best birthday gifts ever. They were full of dragons. Gorgeous figurine dragons. I’ll show pics later.

Thursday was full of good food. I think it was Bear’s best Thanksgiving dinner ever. It was also full of phone calls to say “Happy Birthday! Happy Thanksgiving!” It was full of sunshine and a flat tire on the car.

So Friday I changed the tire (not me, I, the guys down the street that I ordered more tires from, I). Then ordered 4 more tires cause the ones on there had needed to go for a while. Then around 6 I went into the lab to try getting the computer back up and running again. After 5 more hours I gave up and broke the drive mirror and reinstalled on one of the drives. I backed up to my laptop before I did that, so I had a backup of the data on the second drive and on my laptop.

It’s now Sunday and all the programs and drivers are installed again, data (over 20GB) is moved back over, settings and configurations are done.

It was still a great holiday. A great birthday. I’m just so glad I’ve survived. Now I have to go work on the presentation that I forgot about in all the excitement.